


All Apologies

by pantswarrior



Category: Final Fantasy IV
Genre: Final Fantasy Kiss Battle, First Kiss, Forgiveness, Multi, Not Actually Unrequited Love, OT3
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-22
Updated: 2021-02-22
Packaged: 2021-03-12 23:22:10
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,105
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29642268
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/pantswarrior/pseuds/pantswarrior
Summary: Kain won't ask for forgiveness, as he doesn't deserve it. Cecil offers him something better.
Relationships: Cecil Harvey/Kain Highwind, Rosa Joanna Farrell/Cecil Harvey, Rosa Joanna Farrell/Kain Highwind
Comments: 2
Kudos: 11
Collections: Final Fantasy Kiss Battle 2021





	All Apologies

**Author's Note:**

  * For [seventhe](https://archiveofourown.org/users/seventhe/gifts).



> For the prompt: "Cecil/Kain (optional Cecil/Kain/Rosa) — forgivenessz"

"I have no intention of begging you to forgive me."

His head was kept down, his eyes fixed on the fine carpet of the king's private sitting room. Too bad he had no reason to be armored, for the helm had the additional benefit of shielding his eyes from view. At least in the presence of the king - even a king who was an old friend, or had been - it was appropriate for him to stand barely inside the door, head bowed. 

The king in question sighed faintly. "I wouldn't anyhow - I forgave you years ago."

Kain almost looked up in frustration, but caught himself. "...What I came here about didn't happen years ago, Cecil."

"The beginnings of it did. And I've told you before, I don't blame you. How could I, when I love her too? It's more curious to me that _everyone_ doesn't love her."

"You wouldn't blame me for the thoughts, of course," Kain muttered. "For the desires. Of course you could understand and forgive those. But what you called me here about was an action resulting from those thoughts and desires... That's different."

At the edge of his vision, he could see Cecil shake his head. "Different, but not unforgivable. And if you would not ask for or accept my forgiveness, why did you come?"

"For one, because you called me here, and you are my king." Before Cecil could open his mouth to object, Kain went on. "For another, though I can't ask your forgiveness for myself, I would ask it for Rosa. It was my own selfishness that prompted it, and I would not have you angry at her for _my_ lack of self-control."

"...Kain..." Cecil had been seated at the small tea table, but there was the soft scuffing of wood upon carpet as he pushed his chair back and stood. "...I wasn't angry with you when I called you here, but you're doing a good job of changing that." There was a brief pause, an almost inaudible, bitter chuckle. "You were always good at getting under my skin."

"I'm sorry." For that, and many other things.

"Do you think so little of her," Cecil continued, "that she's so weak as to be helpless before you? You know her better than that. If she hadn't wanted you to kiss her, she wouldn't have let you."

There was some truth to that, Kain had to admit - and it was also true that Rosa had not seemed the slightest bit reluctant when a quiet evening together to "catch up" after his deployment had somehow led to holding hands, leaning in... "I'm sure I took her by surprise," Kain stated, shaking off the memory. "Surely she didn't mean it - it was only an instinctive reaction."

Again there was the slightly bitter chuckle. "Oh, she meant it. She told me herself."

_That_ time Kain looked up. And yes, Cecil was regarding him with a grim expression. "She's no fool, Kain. She's smart, careful, thoughtful. She doesn't just... slip up, like you seem to think she did, and honestly it's insulting that you would even say so."

"That wasn't my intention, I'm sorry," Kain muttered. He'd come here to apologize for _kissing_ his best friend's wife, and now here he was apologizing for inadvertently insulting her, too.

It was almost as if Cecil hadn't heard his apology, for his tone didn't change at all. "Rosa knows what she wants, and who. You didn't overpower her, or surprise her, or confuse her. You offered her something she wanted, and she accepted it."

Kain stopped short. Once he would have been thrilled to hear such a thing, and even now he found a lightness rising in his heart at the thought that... Rosa wanted him? That Rosa had changed her mind? But that fluttering hope was overwhelmed now by shame and guilt. "I'm sorry," he said again.

"For _what_ , Kain? For offering her something she's wanted for years? She'd have let it go further, if you hadn't run off like you did!"

"I'm sorry for causing problems between the two of you," Kain said evenly, despite the frustration apparent in Cecil's rising voice. "Between my two oldest friends. I never meant to do either of you harm, or your marriage."

"And I'm telling you, you haven't!"

Cecil was being absurd, and finally Kain snapped. "How can you say that, when you're practically shouting at me? You're talking as if none of this makes any difference to you at all, but just _listen to yourself_ , Cecil! If you're not angry about this, what the hell are you so angry about?"

"I'm-" Cecil cut off the beginnings of another nearly shouted retort, and managed to swallow some of his obvious anger before completing the thought. "...I'm angry at myself, Kain. Not you."

Despite their rivalries and the differences between them over the years, Cecil _was_ Kain's best friend, and had been since they were children. Kain knew that feeling all too well - anger at oneself over not being good enough, making the wrong decisions, saying the wrong things... being in the wrong place at the right time, simply not measuring up. Failing to win Rosa's heart.

The difference was, Kain was certain that Cecil was mistaken. "...Come on, Cecil," he said reluctantly. "You've always been the better man between us. She loves you. She always has. Look - there are things I can attend to out of town for awhile, even if I'm supposed to be on furlough."

Cecil shook his head - now it was the king standing in his own sitting room, head hung low as if he didn't dare to meet Kain's eyes. "You don't have to do that."

"What would you have me do then?" Kain asked. "Do you want me to talk to her? Because honestly..." And it was honest, no matter how much it hurt his heart to think that he might, after all these years, finally have a chance with the girl he had always loved... and that he might have to turn her down. But for Cecil... "...I would."

"I do want you to talk with her," Cecil said quietly. "I want all three of us to sit down and have a talk. But first, I just wanted to... get some things straight. Just between the two of us."

Kain nodded slightly, as Cecil raised his head again, looking him in the eye. "I owe you that much and more. Whatever you have to say, I'll listen. And answer as best as I can."

"I hope so." The quiet words were not quite a whisper, more like a breath, and then Cecil raised a hand, beckoning to him. "Come over here, will you?"

Kain did as he requested, though somewhat puzzled and more than a little wary. They'd been talking just fine with him standing practically in the doorway all this time. It was possible Cecil wanted to get one good punch in... and Kain supposed he deserved that.

As he'd suspected, Cecil reached out when he came close enough, resting a hand on Kain's shoulder as if to keep him there. There was something... odd about it, though. Cecil looked more worried than angry now - second thoughts? 

Well, Kain wouldn't let him back down. "...Go on," he urged Cecil, the hint of a taunt creeping into his voice, just like when they'd been young, fighting with wooden practice swords. "Take your best shot."

From the small curl at the edge of Cecil's lip, Kain thought Cecil must be remembering the same. "Oh... I will." Cecil hesitated only a moment longer before moving abruptly - but not to strike him.

Kain's eyes widened as suddenly Cecil's mouth was pressing against his. Not hard, not demanding - Cecil's kiss was soft and careful. Warmth, Kain thought wonderingly, as his eyes changed their mind and closed absently, but without _heat_. Not so unusual, for the two of them had never, in all the years they'd known each other, spoken of such possibilities. It was no wonder why Cecil might be cautious. But...

Kain had not quite decided what he thought about that before it was over, Cecil drawing back and letting his shoulder loose, turning his head to the side. "That's what I mean, about being angry with myself. ...She's braver than I, Kain. Braver than either of us, probably."

"...I think I agree." _That_ had been unexpected, and Kain found himself slightly breathless in spite of the kiss having been so soft. Come to think of it, that explained... at least a few moments in their youth that he'd never quite been able to explain before. Both Cecil's behavior, and his own.

And just like that, it was as if the both of them were the same awkward youths again, uncertain how to express what they really meant, what they really wanted. Kain just didn't know what to say, and Cecil was slightly flushed, his eyes averted, as he asked. "So, ah... I don't know if that... did anything for you...?"

As if he was not a man married years now. Kain had somewhat less experience, or so he would have assumed, having mostly lived a life of seclusion for the last while. And he didn't know whether it had or not - he'd been too surprised by it happening at all to determine whether he enjoyed it or not.

So perhaps honesty was, in this case, the best policy. "I'm not sure." And even as Kain spoke, he recognized a small shiver of anticipation. "...Maybe you should try it again."

"Hm." That seemed to reassure Cecil somewhat, and he smiled slightly before once again leaning in. "All right..."

This time Kain was ready, waiting to feel Cecil's lips against his own and truly _consider_ what he thought about it. This time Cecil seemed a bit more confident, for it was more an actual kiss than a brush of the lips, but still gentle, undemanding. Nice, certainly not repulsive to Kain, but merely... nice. 

And thus he was not sure what to say when Cecil backed off again, and again asked. "Well...?"

"...Not bad..." Cecil had been wanting this for awhile, Kain realized suddenly, taking his actions and his words into context. Wanting it, and too afraid - where Rosa hadn't been. So of course he still looked wary, of course he still was being gentle, trying not to... scare Kain away? Was that it?

It had to be. But _not_ trying to get the better of him wasn't the Cecil he knew, Kain thought. Hoping he wasn't about to cross the line, Kain let himself smirk slightly. "...But I mean, come on. I've been kissed harder by your wife."

For a moment, Cecil looked stunned, indignant. Then he appeared to recognize what Kain was doing, and a slow grin spread across his face. "You're asking for it, Highwind."

"Yeah, well, I'm ready whenever you are."

Now _that_ was more like it, Kain thought with satisfaction as Cecil's mouth met his again, pressing more firmly, lips parting as Kain's did, as if to drink each other in. Cecil's hand was on his shoulder again, the other wrapping around his waist... but almost gingerly. Kain found his own hand on Cecil's jaw, guiding their mouths together...

"Better," he acknowledged when they again parted, this time not so far, for Cecil's arm was still around his waist, and Kain's other hand had drifted up to take him by the arm. Since that had worked so well... "But I think you're still holding back. Or is that really all you've got?"

Clearly Cecil knew exactly what he was playing at. "...You're right, I was holding back," he muttered, if rather cheerfully.

The next time they parted, Kain was shoved up against the wall. It had been some time since he'd done... anything of this nature. And yes, now he was certain that Cecil's kiss _definitely_ did something for him. As did the sight of Cecil so close against him, panting... but grinning. "Had enough? Or do you want more?"

"...You know," Kain observed, "now I'm going to need to go apologize to Rosa later." And given the way this apology had gone, and what Cecil had had to say about the incident with Rosa... "...And maybe then come apologize to you again."

"I'm going to need to apologize to her too," Cecil pointed out, leaning against Kain's shoulder as he held him up against the wall. "Not that she doesn't know what this meeting was to be about. She suggested if it went well, we might come and... apologize to her... together, later."

Now _that_ was an intriguing thought.


End file.
